This week

Can't believe it's already Friday. Almost.
This week flew by. What even happened??!!
Briggs cried today when I took him to preschool.
Ari didn't have soccer practice Monday because they did so well in their game Saturday.
My dad was in town this weekend.
I made everyone dinner Tuesday night.
The weather has been so amazing.
I've gone to a park 27 times in the last 5 days.
Quinn. Quinn had her 2 month shots and cried the most I've ever heard her cry.
Ari starts basketball next week. So that means soccer mon/wed. Bball Tues/Thurs. F.
Life is so busy. I never shower. I'm lucky when I do. I feel like it's a mini vacation...unless of course Briggs showers with me...which happens 2 out of the 3 times I shower a week. LOLOLOL.
I bought a 24 pack of blue moon for no good reason at costco....
I finally bought a rain jacket. The first rain jacket I've owned since moving back to Seattle almost 9 years ago. Which brings up another crazy stat. 9 years ago?!??!

I am so in love with these days. I mean when Briggs is digging in the dirt in his fresh clean outfit and won't come inside and yells at me for a spoonful of nutella and peanut butter I might have a spout of anger...but deep deep down, I'm liking where I am at. Life is messy, loud, dirty.

life

oh man. 

tomorrow quinn is 2 months old. 2 months. she seems huge and happy. and not real. she got her first cold and now giggles. what? i am seriously in love with her. its so different with #3. i'm not as scared. less paranoid. feeling so very grateful. cheese ass ball. i know. 

briggs is finally not being so crazy towards her. i mean he still touches her eyeballs and rocks the crap out of her car seat... but he's gotten so much better.  he loves mrs. kristy his very first teacher and going to school. he doesn't really tell me anything about his time at school. the teacher told me he was a leader. let's see if he bites or pinches anyone by next month after he feels nice and comfy there.

ari. my little lulu seriously isn't little anymore. she is so in middle school. like totally. like oh my gosh, IKR (i know right)....I find myself saying I know right to grown women. ugh. she's in full soccer mode. almost half way through the season. they haven't lost. she's loving school and the bus and i'm loving her instgram post. that girl loves her quotes.

coaster boy. oh zebby. he definitely gets the short end of the stick, but lately...i'm madly in love with him. i also wanted to kill him about a month ago. i think it takes a good month or two to figure out having another person in your life. no matter how amazing and easy they are, it's taken time to adjust to splitting my time with another little human. 

Cat Nap

This kid. Always getting woken up to pick up sissy for school. Or to go to one of mommy's classes. Or to head to one of sissy's games or practices.

A full nap these days is a rarity. Looking forward to our new schedule of interrupted sleep during the week!

No more Fly Flex at 12pm. A little bitter sweet.

xo

Life

Lately. Life has been pulling on my heart strings.

I feel like I have so much more appreciation for the little things. Sunsets, wisteria, gardening, having a made bed. I feel like I'm settling in to being at home more and feeling more comfy teaching.

Things are slower. Calmer. Less crazy. Amen.

A little quote I stole from BrookieBrooke's instagram:

Sometimes I need to only stand wherever I am to be blessed - Mary Oliver

Remi

Tonight I was updating my Facebook Info section to Group Fitness Instructor (I know so important) and decided to take a little walk down memory lane on my Facebook albums.

Let's just say I found a couple amazing pictures (that I've now deleted)!  I stumbled over to my wedding album and started to get all teary. Time goes so fast. Ari was so little and for some reason I felt like she was so old when we got married. I feel like my skin and body look so different. It made me think over and over, to take advantage of today. Make the very most of it...because it all. goes. so. fast.

I remember my Meemaw always telling me when I was younger, just wait until your older, time goes so fast. And it does. Every year it seems to go faster.  I think all of us reading this know that feeling, and it makes us want to take a deep breath.
So to take us back...five years....in honor of #tbt
This ones for you, Suzy and Heather. To Vegas. Late nights. Dancing all night long. Just living the dream.

This Journey

34! Hello. This year is all about enjoying this life. Chatting with my sister, Coaster Boy and Tim on my birthday about what my goals are for this year...the only thing that really came to mind is to chill the freak out! And I think the last couple of months I've gotten so much better at being less of a freaker. But I still have a long way to go.
So my goals for this year:
Not be so up tight - relax. Enjoy this journey (the stresses, chaos, the joys...everything)
Learn more about exercise and the body
Lead a growth group

Easy Breezy.

Lots

On my mind the last couple of days. I wish I could put into words what it is exactly that I'm feeling. But it's hard. I can't quite pinpoint it.

Not sure if it's because Briggs is 1 or Ari is 10 and her schedule is nuts and I'm feeling like I'm loosing a little bit of her. She's so busy. Zeb and I were talking last night how we would so much rather her so busy she can't think about anything else other than school and sports.
I keep finding myself taking deep breathes. All. Day. Long. Time is going too fast. Things are changing too fast. And I'm reminded again and again, I need to put my stupid phone down. I need to write more. Blog more. Capture more memories (guess I am doing this with my phone). I so wish I had this blog when Ari was Briggsy age. Everything is so thrilling. So new. First steps (not yet), first birthdays, sites, and experiences. I love the newness of having Briggs and love even more that I'm reminded everyday (by watching Lu) how fast it all goes.

Love that they are making the same face.

Hey---oooooo

It's Tuesday!
Who knows! My week days feel like weekends these days.
Life is cray cray. Can't seem to keep up with everything, but I wouldn't want it any other way.
Here a little bit of what's been going on this week.

Big B-Ball Game
1st Hair cut
Someone is about to walk (not) but almost
Visit with girlfriend Sienna
14 days of Valentines is in full affect right now!
I would have an even amount of photos of my children, but my little Lu is rarely home. With sports, rehearsals for her play, play-dates, sleepovers...I'm missing her. I get her all to myself for the next 6 days though. WOOT WOOT! Not letting her outta my sight,

Looking back...and Forward

T just posted this post. 

One year ago TODAY we took this picture.
I was prego (obviously)
Working at Amazon
Probably had really high blood pressure
Had really blonde hair
Was a momma to only 1.
Loved taking bathroom pics

Today, I've been teaching for 1 month at Fly Fitness.
I remember this picture like it was yesterday.
It makes me so proud of myself.
So in honor of the self bathroom pic, here I am, 1 year later:

Wet hair
Putting my playlist together for my 12pm class
Briggs is sleeping
My house is a mess
I should be cleaning
Laundry machine is in full force
Happy heart
Momma to two
Group Fitness Instructor!!!

I love looking back. Even more so, I love looking back and seeing how much has changed for the better in a year. So much better than looking back and seeing the same old person!

XO

#abetterme

Working on this daily.

Goal

To start blogging everyday (M-F) again!!!

Miss my blogging diary.

Photo Bomb

Catching up...just a couple photos from my phone. Ok, maybe more than a couple...

I'm so in love with my kiddos right now.
6 months and 9 years old. Perfect ages. They both still love me and think I'm pretty funny.

Ok, pause. 

Snips

Today.

6:30 B wakes up (hour early) play, eat, snuggle, smell his neck 20 times
7:30 A wakes
7:35 A and I eat hunny nut
8:00 Shower
8:40 depart for work
8:40 I'm feeling good. Today I'm not gonna cry
9:01 Stuck in mad traffic, get a really sweet email on facebook while parked on mercer and start to cry
9:40 Pull into work (after several f bomb text to Z and H)
9:55 Finally arrive at my desk after 5 levels of parking, two elevators, and three drops of visine
10:00 PUMP I'm starting to leak
10:25 finally logging on to my computer
11:00 Coffee with T (things are looking up)
11:20 - 1:00 Try to remember how to book meeting and conference rooms, move request, space plan...
1:00 take the stairs to the 11th floor to PUMP (im going to do this from now on)
1:30 Meet T and K for a fast lunch
2:15 Work
3:15 down 2 elevators, 5 garage levels, back to mercer
4:00 Home!!!!!!!!!!!!! B and A both up and happy. LOVE this.
4:10 Booby feed
4:40 Run to Petco for bday party gift (didn't have enough time for target, lucky ellie got a fish. found out about party yesterday)
5:00 Pick up gift wrap
5:15 Home solids for B
5:45 Off to soccer!!
6:00 Home (coaster boy is grocery shopping)
6:30 Give B a bath and snugs
7:00 Snuggle buggle my lover boy briggs
7:15 yummy salad out back with coaster boy. he's so good. mr. mom today
7:25 cobbler. thanks mom. and wash all my pumping equitment (third time today)
7:30 catch up on work while watching NY Med (new fav show) 1300 emails to go
9:05 Lulu gets home (ellie screamed when she got her fish...which reminds me, I need to email her mom and apologize...i hate fish).
9:25 Tuck my little lu into bed
9:40 facebook/insta/blog/stalk
10 start my bedtime routine

I am ready for tomorrow. My first full day back.

Dear Ari & Briggs

The dreaded week arrived. And I've been totally putting off this post because, well, I can't even wrap my head around how to explain or write what it's like going back to work after having the last 5.5 months off with you two little chicken butts.

So I'm putting it plain and simple. I've cried everyday since I've gone back. Even today when I'm not even going to work. Anything can set me off into tears... turning into a crowded parking garage or getting a random text from someone saying, thinking about you or simply a song on the radio. I'm a crybaby. As a matter of fact, I'm teary just thinking about getting teary. But, that my little lovers is just a sign of where your momma's heart is at. Torn.

I'm not gonna lie. I've dropped the F bomb a lot the last week. I know, that isn't right. But I'm angry. And when momma's angry I swear. WEIRD. Lulu, I know that isn't my best word choice. Thank you (always) for that reminder.

I miss you guys. I know you miss me too. Ar, you told me last night before I tucked you in with tears in your eyeballs that you missed me becuase I make it loud in the house and Nonnie doesn't let you eat a lot of sugar (made me laugh and cry at the same time). Oh my little lulu bear, no one will ever let you eat as much sugar as I do...guarentee it.

Briggs, I think you are a little indifferent on the sitch. I get home, you look at me and smile then go right back to your toy or hands or grabbing your feet (yes! you can finally grab your toes #yogababy). I do know that you miss me a little because last night you woke up twice!! just to get some nuzzles with your momma. I'm ok with that. For realz...but let's not make that a nightly habit.

So my little angel babies. I'm heart broken. You see, Amazon loves ME so much they want me in their office every little single day of the week. Even with blood shot, puffy eyeballs.

This week I'm really, really, really going to try and not cry everyday. And be super positive. And know that this is just a dot (remember that crazy post) and that it's not always going to be like this.