Tuesday, March 27, 2012

On being a Momma

So last night was probably one of those nights that I've read about from many other momma bloggers but really have never fully experienced it for myself. I mean we all have them. And when you have two children, I think it heightens things a bit. This weekend we took Briggs to church for the first time and three minutes into the sermon, Briggs needed to eat. I didn't bring my hooter hider (thanks T for my hooter hider) and Briggs needed to eat AND every kid in that room was coughing, it was like the parents didn't want to put their sick kids in the nursery so they took them in the family room. So I bounced (I'm the biggest germ-a-fob and I didn't want to whip my huge ass, veiny, white, big nipped titty out in church, it just didn't feel right). So I left Zeb with Heather who whipped out her titty with no hesitation (I'm working on this...) and went to "feed" Briggs in the car. He then proceeded to poop the biggest poop he's ever pooped. Explosion. I took a picture. And since I didn't want to put him back into his seat to take him back inside to change him (he HATES his car seat and everyone was coughing) I decided to change him in the car. To do this, I had to remove his car seat and the base so he had a level area to lay on while I changed him....OK, this isn't what I was planning on writing about. But it's just one of those situations you aren't planning for, those creeper uppers...like last night was one of them. Ari got sick...like throwing up and pooping. This could have been from the coleslaw I made or perhaps the many bites of frosting for our amazing chocolate cake, or my biggest fear: she is starting her period?!?!....Needless to say, Zeb and I were fine. She was not. It was horrible. She was feeling so sicky and Briggs was freaking out cuz he needed to eat and would NOT let me put him down. Zeb went to the store to grab Gatorade and saltines and I couldn't console either of them. While she was throwing up, Briggs was screaming at a level I've never heard him scream. It was complete mayhem. I hated it. Hated every last minute. It was hard and stressful and I felt completely helpless. And I know there are gonna be many more times when this happens, and I'm just glad to know that these moments don't last forever. They always end. There is always light at the end of the tunnel. So when Briggs is crying his eyeballs out, I can just laugh and say DUDE, chill out. And Lu...when you are ralphing alone in the bathroom, know that I will always be standing outside waiting and wondering how you are doing.
In those moments when being a momma (or meme) that I feel so completely helpless and there isn't much I can do but try my darnest to love the heck out of my kids, so when one is ralphing (and I'm scared they might have the flu and the other one is only 3 weeks old and I'm scared he might get the flu) and the other is crying his balls off and I can't give my utmost attention to either of them, I hope they know I love the heck out of them. The kind of love that no matter what they do or say or what they look like or what they choose to wear to school, or if they cry every single time they get in their car seat. I love em. Like crazy. Crazy, crazy, love.

The greatest of these is love! 1cor13:13


Carrie said...

Love this post, your not alone every parent struggles at times. It's only hard because you love them so deeply and truly care. Take moments like these one minute at a time.

Zeb said...

She knows how much you love her because of the crazy love you've showered her with the last 9 years.

He knows how much you love him in spite of only being here for 3 weeks.

I know you love them by how great a job you do everyday in making sure they, I know it.

I've heard being a mom is tough work, but you do a great job and make it look easy.

Nice work big momma, you are loved mucho.


Meghan said...

Mucho CB!

MrsAngieW said...

of course they know how much you love them, how could they not? Just look at the amazing young lady that Ari is and at her loving heart (she learned that from all the love you show her). Briggs might have been here for only a short time but you've already shown him how much he's loved even while he was still in your womb.

It's hard work being a mama and having 2 even harder but you're going to be amazing at it and make the rest of us jealous with how easy you make it look :)

Just remember how much your kids love you and that you are an amazing mama.

Tanya (a Taste of T) said...

YOu're doing great Mama and Daddy! Poor Ari :)


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